Sir Eric Green at the BBQ last week….
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My week back after my trip home was busy and stressful, but good. Work’s at hectic as ever, but I think we’re really gaining traction on some important issues. Man night on Thursday was also really good, as the focus of the group definitely shifted and I think we’re really on course to take it to the next level. After that, I set a goal to completely relax this weekend and was very successful. Friday evening I had a great night out with some of the gang, and got far drunker than I expected too.
Consequently Saturday morning I slept in a bit, and was oh so greatful for the little to no sunlight I get in my downstairs room. great for a hangover! Had an amazing breakfast at Lucille’s with my friend Casey, and then spent the great part of the afternoon at the Boulder Creek Festival, which is an annual occurence here in Boulder. Between that and the Bolder Boulder this town is a very lively fun place to be on Memorial Day Weekend. Live music, tons of food, political/environmental groups, and a ton of people and warm sun made for a great afternoon. Then capped it off with an early evening showing of X3, which they could have called X-meh…..as it was pretty meh. I then planned on staying in for the rest of the evening, but somehow ended back at the Sundown Saloon with some of the gang from the night before. I simply can’t re-iterate how much I fucking love being able to walk to bars again!
The rest of the weekend was very chill, and I managed to catch up on my movie watching. I Know I’m Not Alone was amazing, and completely solidified some ideas I’ve been having about a non-profit I’d like to start. So that was cool, some of my longer term life goals are starting to really emerge.
Next was Amos Perros, that 2.5 hour monster of a movie I’ve rented a few times before but never watched, well i finally hit that one out of the park baby. And it was of course well worth it.
So things are going pretty well. Money is definitely still the biggest stress in my life, but I’m holding to the hope that it’ll still work itself out. And if not, I’ll do whatever the fuck it takes to make sure it does.
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Look’s like I might be about to pull an all nighter! So time to type while I can.
My week in Illinois went by in a flash. It was pretty exhausting really, and brought up a lot of emotions. I feel like I’ve gone through every conceivable mood in the last week: regretful, overjoyed, exhausted, mad, sad, jealous, depressed, anxious, happy, and everything else in between. It was one hell of a ride.
This year is an important one to me that I’m feeling is going to make or break a lot of things in my life. And I’m starting to feel that the next time I blink and open my eyes years will have gone by, not seconds.
The honeymoon portion of my move to Boulder is ending, and all that shit I’ve tried to run away from everytime I’ve moved in the past is coming right back to the surface as it always does.
But I finally think I’m ready to take it head on, and manage to have a pretty kick ass time while doing so. A lot of my ideas about what I’d like to do with myself in the long term started to solidfy in the last few days, and I’m going to do my damnest to use every tool available to me in Boulder to arm myself to be the best damn person I can possibly be.
Things aren’t perfect, and never will be. But I’m learning to just relax and enjoy the ride.
This is my kind of love.
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That’s not the line from “Corduroy”. But it should be. I went to my first of hopefully five Pearl Jam shows last night. Yup, you read that right, FIVE. A new record. Even for me. And it was with another Ten Club member at that. It couldn’t have been a better night. I love Pearl Jam. I really do. On so many levels. Why do I love Pearl Jam?
I actually don’t listen to Pearl Jam albums that much. During off season, months will usually pass in which I don’t put on a single record of theirs. In the back of my mind, I know how good they are and that they’ll always be there. So I start to take them for granted, and slowly start to forget.
Then, they’ll release an album. I love when they release albums, because its one of the few times in my life I can definitively say, ‘on this day my life will be changed forever’. Not changed in any major way, but in a measurable way. Now when I do listen to PJ, I can choose from X numbers of albums, one more than before!
Ten I bought at Best Buy, in 8th grade. Vitalogy I got for Xmas in 8th grade. VS. I got around Easter in 8th grade.
I got No Code when I was a sophomore. My mother and I went to the DMV to get my learners permit, and I stopped at Tower Records next door. I had been listening to “Who You Are” on repeat nearly the entire month before that.
Yield I got in ‘98, when I was a Junior. I was working at CompUSA at the time, which closed at 9. Thus to get it that first day, I had to have my mom pick it up before she got me from work.
Binaural was in 2000. I was in Southern California, that Urban wasteland of highways and roads. Jessica Wickum had to drive me to Best Buy to pick it up.
Riot Act was fall of 2002. I got it at Streetlight Records on Pacific Avenue in Santa Cruz, on my way to one of my very first staff meetings at the group home.
Pearl Jam [Self-Titled], I pre-ordered through the ten club. It technically arrived on April 29th, but I didn’t get it until the 30th when Mike Arens picked me up for the airport and we rolled back to Boulder.
Now, back to what really matters. No two shows are ever alike. No setlist is ever the same. Their catalogue is so huge there’s no way it could be. Songs are always played differently, the band always sounds differently, the energy of the room is always unique, my seats are always different, daughter/betterman usually have unique tags, and you never know who’ll they’ll cover or what famous rockstar will show up on stage with them.
Yet, every Pearl Jam show is also exactly the same. I know the structure of the show and what it will be like: eddie drinking a bottle of wine, length generally between 2-3 hours, 3 sets, last one always ends with a rocking cover, and then Yellow Ledbetter. And then me walking out in a daze. State experience indeed.
Everytime I go to a Pearl Jam show, I’m a completely different person. Years go by between Pearl Jam tours, and often months between shows. I’ve seen them at Soldier Field with Steve when I was hardly pubescent……..Madison Square Garden with Matt in New York……St. Louis with Lorne………Indianapolis with Seth…………….San Francisco on Halloween with liz, shawn, and mark……..Ed at the Tibetin Freedon concert……….acoustic with ben harper at the Bridge School Benefit……..Santa Barbara for the re-unification of Temple of the Dog after driving 6 hours straight with Matt, and of course, the United Center with Kelly.
Everytime I go to a show, I’m re-living those moments. I am those moments, I am inhabit all those selves at once:
I’m Jason at a Pearl Jam show, having the best time in my life.
But I’m also not. I’m different. I’ve grown. I’ve changed. I’ve deepened my awareness since, and hopefully cultivated myself into a better human being. I have new memories, new pains, new regrets, new stresses, new joys. I even look different physically.
Then suddenly, when those lights go down, that all falls away. I fall away. I’m living that same moment I’ve lived a thousand times before. It IS the same moment as all those times before. I simply Am. That’s the thing about Pearl Jam shows for me, when I’m there, I feel it, I get it. All those meditations and practices make sense. I just AM. I settle in I amness. The moment that lasts forever and never goes away……never changes……..the past, the present, and the future…….are ALL just one big pearl jam show.
Everything has changed, absolutely nothings changed. Impermanence and Permanence. Maybe you get it, maybe you don’t. either way, i hope you have something in your life that affects you in similar ways.
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1st pearl jam show was incredible. Special thanks go out to kelly for being excellent PJ company and driving…. More details on that later…….but first:
The lastest update from Niles about his amazing Chacabuco documentary…
I’m leaving this coming monday, the 22nd for Chacabuco, to shoot the documentary and the project is really evolving! Here is a little update on what’s been happening:
Last week I interviewed two concentration camp survivors from Chacabuco. They had been in the camp for one year between 1973 and 1974. Both men are now in their 70s, one of them spent 2 years in 6 different concentration camps in Chile and was then exiled to Panamal until 1990. It was an incredible experience interviewing them- painful and awakening. Both men were so grateful to be interviewed, we spoke for about 3 hours all in all. And by the end of the interview they told me they wanted to come with Will (a friend who is coming with me) and I to Chacabuco. They are going to meet us there on May 24thand 25th and return to Chacabuco for the first time since their incarceration there! I was dumbfounded, and still am really.
“The men are going to pay for their own tickets since the amount of funding I’ve gotten so far is just enough to get the project on its feet. I have enough to film it and get there… so Will and I are going by bus, cutting costs… but we need to at least make the old budget goal of $1,400 to be able to reimburse the tickets for these two men, it is the least we can do for them!
Please visit the website
http://www.chacabuco.org/support.htm to support the project with whatever donation you can muster up (really, anything is appreciated even $5 or $10). All who donate will get a credit in the film (if you don’t have a problem with it of course, if you want to remain anonymous just let me know). Time is running out, less than a week left so hurry! AND THANK YOU! Check out the article in the Santiago Times here:
http://www.tcgnews.com/santiagotimes/index.php?nav\u003dstory &story_id\u003d11248&topic_id\u003d1 And keep updated by checking out the blog which is updated 2 or 3 times a week. The men are going to pay for their own tickets since the amount of funding I’ve gotten so far is just enough to get the project on its feet. I have enough to film it and get there… so Will and I are going by bus, cutting costs… but we need to at least make the old budget goal of $1,400 to be able to reimburse the tickets for these two men, it is the least we can do for them!
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As shocking as it might sound, I’m yet again sitting at the airport, with another delayed flight. Only 45 minutes this time, so nothing too horrible. I guess its been raining in chicago all day causing some delays.
As I was sitting here, munching on some food, an older gentleman walked by. He immediately stood out in my mind, as he had the same hairstyle as an uncle of mine. This gentleman was not exactly short, but had a certain ’stoutness’ about him. His hair was greying and curley, and he had a big warm cuddely face.
He walked around for a bit, scouted out a place to sit. He finally settled on a row of seats in the center of the wing, right smack in the midlde of all the gates with lots of traffic walking by.
He stretched out a bit, sat down, and proceeded to make himself comfortable while opening his bag next to him. Next, just as I as beginning to finish my pizza, he reached deep into the abyss of his bag. He pulled out something I didn’t expect. A long, colorful, uninflated baloon. He took a deep breathe, completely ignoring all those around him and proceeded to give life to the baloon. There was twisting, turning, and a whole lot of squeeking. Mintutes rolled by, and soon the baloon was a poodle. A beautiful, beautiful poodle.
He set the poodle on the seat next to him, closed his bag, got up and left, giving that poodle not only the gift of life, but now of freedom. Be free poodle, be happy, and have the best life you’ve ever lived.
I deeply regret packing my camera in my checked baggage. But maybe the poodle will still be there when I fly back next week…..
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“With the co-op service, users with a personal Google login will be able to label web pages so the information can be easily found by other people, including friends, family and co-workers. ”
Web 2.0 finally hits the web! The web really is experiencing its 2nd golden age. I just spent 20 minutes browsing YouTube and Google Videos for UCSC & Santa Cruz videos. Tagging, its amazing.
And now its hit the web. You join my co-op. We’re linked to our other friends. We go hang out in Santa Cruz, have lunch at Planet Fresh, and decide its the best meal we’ve ever had. Using google co-op, we tag Planet Fresh as being an amazing meal, highly recommended by us.
Two months from now, our mutual friend Jane visits Santa Cruz and needs a restaurant to have lunch at! So she googles “santa cruz restaurants” and damn, wouldn’t you know it! There’s some info about how you and me (and everyone we know for that matter) particularly like Planet Fresh! So jane goes there and has a delicious meal and her day is made.
That’s just one small example of what’s going on here. MySpace was just the beginning, and really the most useless part of social networking. Now the real fun is about to begin. Shared information. Shared likes. Shared everything. All accessible through a simple google search.
It really is an amazing time to be alive. Consciousness is continuing to become conscious of itself. (try a google blog search………and a google trends search and you’ll be discovering the Zeitgeist in REAL TIME!)
Less than one week until Pearl Jam (and Seth’s wedding of course)
Rock on.
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For all us Henson fans out there.
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Last night ended up being pretty great in the end. Despite the super delayed flight, I arrived safely in Denver and was promptly picked up by my old bud Mike Arens, who was kind enough to have a 12 pack of heineken with him.
We got back to my house in boulder by 1 or so, and I was delighted to find that the new Pearl Jam album had arrived while I was gone. Needless to say, I went to bed a very happy man a few beers and a great album later. Less than 2 weeks to my first two pearl jam shows of the season, I can’t wait.
We got up relatively early for breakfast, and Mike’s visit was all the excuse I needed to finally check out the fabled Lucille’s for breakfast. Neither of us were able to finish our meals they were so large!
We then took a quick stroll down Pearl and then Mike was on his way! Great times.
I finally watched the Stephen Colbert White House Correspondance video today. And all I can say is he’s got balls of steel……check it out: http://thankyoustephencolbert.org/
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